honor and obey

Reading through this black and white composition notebook that I jotted down hundreds of different quotes and thoughts from the my get-away a few weeks ago...

I was trying to pick another one to share with you all... and since it came up in conversation this weekend I figured it's a good one to share with you all today....

The difference between honoring and obeying.... 

Watch out now! Those are two heavy words that I really don't like using... maybe it's my issues with authority... growing up these kind of words would make me run the opposite direction, kind of like the word submission (I'll save that for blog of it's own), back to the point... honor and obey....

Obey is the action and Honor is an issue of the heart

I scribbled this down in my notebook and put a big star next too it, I knew it was something I would need to come back to for myself and my children... they share their mother's authority issues 

(remember caught not taught). 

Children are called to obey their parents

Colossians 3:20 says, "Children obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord"

Now I can't be the only one who has told my children. "the Bible says you are to OBEY your parents...."

Go to your room, 

pick up your toys, 

don't talk mean to your sister, 

be nice to your brother, 

get your finger out of our nose... 

on and on and on.... 

And when they listen.. this my friends is the action of obeying. 

but I don't want my children just to obey me, following my commands as a sort of dictator (well, yes sometimes that is nice), I want them to understand my words are teaching them something, out of love I am teaching them, yes telling them to stop picking their nose is down out of love.... but I want my children to honor me. 

Honor comes from the heart and yes, 

children are called to honor their parents; 

Ephesians 6:2 says, "Children honor your father and mother" 

While I can tell my children to go pick up their toys and most likely they will do it... but will they put their things away orderly with an attitude that honors you as their parents or are they slamming things into drawers, huffing and puffing about what you have asked of them?

I told my six year old, "I am glad you obey me, but I want you to honor me too." 

This word, honor, is not one I thought of as having a place in everyday conversations with my children, 

I'm realizing just how necessary it is though.

Are we not called to obey and honor our Heavenly Father?

Now, the hard part, are you leading by example? 

not just obeying but honoring your Earthly parents? 

how about your Heavenly Father?

If  you ask me to obey part is easy...

Honoring comes from within, it's the emotion in which we obey. 

And we are always leading them by example. The best example I can give my children is for my heart to honor God and my parents as they ask me to obey.... big gulp.. as that was even a bit hard to pluck out on the keyboard (these authority issues may be bigger than I realized). 

Just another thought from the black and white composition notebook, 

I figured someone else may need to receive this message just as much as I did... 

caught not taught

Last week I spent two days away from my loves and nurtured my mind and spirit.
I was reminded how sometimes we need to "put the oxygen mask on ourselves, so that we can protect the ones we love the most" 

No doubt that the Lord blessed this gathering of his faithful followers as the joined together to learn, share triumphs and failures, encouragement and skills with one another.
This was for homeschool parents, but no doubt in my mind all parents would have felt empowered and encouraged by the words that filled the air.
During the next few weeks I plan on making time to sit down and pluck out some of the encouragement that I received during this weekend... figure why not share the joy! I hope you find encouragement and share it with others as well...


And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near. -Hebrews 10:24-25

So to kick off... 

I'd like to begin with one of many quotes I jotted down in my black and white composition notebook....

"Most things are caught, not taught"

This can be from multiple arenas... what are your kids learning at school, church, work, with their peers, or with you? 

Oh, nelly... this hits home to me. You see our house is loud! I have vivid memories in the not so distant past, screaming at the top of my lungs "stop yelling!"

It's almost comical to think about, thinking about all the times I scream at my children to 'be quiet, use your inside voice'.... 

The rationale, is that I need to be louder than they are (which is very loud) 

but where did they learn to be loud? their momma. 

You see, my man, he hates loud yelling... when he comes home from work the thing the bugs him the most is when I am stressed and fussing at kids, I always wondered why it was when Daddy raises his voice everyone in the house stops, even the dog. 

Yet, I yell all day long and no one listens... that's just it you see, Daddy never yells, so when he does all eyes are on him because there is a reason for it. 

When I yell.. it's just another day in the life... or so it used to be. 

The first thing my daughter said when I got back, mommy your voice is different.... I have had those words stuck in my throat for the last week.. hard to swallow those words.. but thankful that she noticed her momma will fix it when she's been wrong. 

While I was away I had time to think, clear my mind, be filled with good thoughts and some humbling ones too...

Be easy on yourself, we all make mistakes, but we also are all offered the opportunity to start a new day... another resounding message at the convention "God's mercies are new everyday, somewhere on Earth, it's a new day... so start over now!"

I thought about the things I don't like that happens in my home... the humbling part, what I don't like... starts with me. 

So while I teach them to speak kindly to one another, they catch what I'm throwing out... and that, gulp, isn't always kindness....

So, remember most things are caught, not taught... what are you throwing? what are they catching?