no carb, no gluten pizza

I got this one from pinterest.
I've been wanting to make it for a while. I don't know why but I thought it was going to be time consuming... wasn't at all!
Tony says we will be eating this one for dinner at least once a week.
For those who know Tony he often does a low carb diet to shed unwanted pounds, usually it isn't too hard to find recipes that are low carb and gluten free but until now pizza was a no go when he was doing low carbs...

So whether your gluten free or carb free this one is a keeper.

For the crust:
1 (8 oz.) package of full fat cream cheese (room temp.)
2 eggs
Freshly ground black pepper
Garlic powder
1/4 cup grated parmesan cheese

For the pizza:
1/2 cup jarred marinara sauce*
1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
Sauteed pepperoni
or whatever you like on your pie

How to bake:
Preheat oven to 350.
Butter a 9×13 baking dish
Blend cream cheese and eggs and season with pepper & garlic powder
Add parmesan cheese and stir until combined
Pour into buttered baking dish



Bake for 17 minutes, until crust is golden brown



LET SIT FOR 10 MINUTES before adding toppings *this is VERY important!
Bump the heat up too 400 degrees

Add toppings, bake another 8-10 minutes


Allow to cool and enjoy!!



You will most likely have to eat this pizza with a fork but when gluten free no carb pizza is your only option eating it with a fork is really no big deal. :)

my memories

Every once and a while I like to update on the "happenings around here"

My blog is not only my way of connecting with the outside world (since I spend my days trapped in this place with two monsters guarding my door) but it is also my journal. I love looking back at old blogs and reading what God has revealed to me at that time in my life, the important dates like Troy's first birthday, Sophia's cute little phrases, fun things we do together as a family... it's all on my blog... my blog is my journal to look back at the good memories and the not so good ones.

So tonight's blog is updating my memories :)

Tony is doing good at work. He is enjoying the new dealership. He likes working with his Dad, they make a good team. Tony is a good man, the kind of man who brings his exhausted wife a Coke Zero at the end of the night and kisses her forehead and tells her to go get a shower :) We have been staying up late every night working on the house, putting in new light fixtures, painting, building walkways outside at midnight (I'm sure our neighbors hate us). Tony's love for the Lord has grown and I'm so proud of him, happy for him and I see the change in his life. I adore him and I am so thankful that we have come this far. Our marriage is a blessing, it was fought for and it feels so good standing in the winner's circle with him. I'm holding out for a weekend getaway with my man soon, hint hint Tony... :)

Sophia is 6 years old, learning to read, loves math and continues to have her Daddy wrapped around her little finger. She never stops talking. She loves being homeschooled, co-op, Awana and most recently a little buckskin pony named, Coco. Most days Sophia is a joy to our home, she does like to provoke her brother as he does her, but most days she is our baby doll toting, makeup sneaking, always into something girly girl. Sophia hasn't had a seizure in a while now, we are seeking some alternative opinions and second opinions, I'm not ready yet but soon I'll give an update about all of that. We have some big appointments coming in the next two months, I'll keep you updated. She had her eye surgery and all went well, other than her new unique ability to breath out of her eyeball... I'm not kidding, I told her she's like a super hero now. I plan on talking to the doctor about it when she goes for her 3 month post op visit.



Troy is 4 years old, sweet little man, who loves his momma. He can't make a decision these days without "eni- meni- myni- mo-" which sounds cute but very well may drive me insane if he doesn't get over this phase soon. Troy eats everything, he is 35lbs now and quite proud of his skinny self. He walks around saying "I'm 35 points!" His favorite thing to eat is tomatoes... he eats them like apples. He waits all day for his Daddy to get home from work to "fight", he likes to wrestle and sword fight and would probably stay up all night "fighting" with his Daddy (his favorite super hero). He loves praying and every prayer starts with "Dear God, I hope we have a great day tomorrow-" Cutest. Thing. Ever.



That's all for now.. my productive day painting, playing outside, reading books and playing "Momma Bears" with the kids has worn me out.

Church bright and early tomorrow so I better get in bed... can't wait to worship our AWESOME God!!

God is stronger

Tucking them in bed...

After I sing, we pray, she looks up at me and says, "Momma, God told me the devil is getting stronger"

Deep breath...

"Yes it does seem that way sometimes"

Deep breath again...

"But God is stronger than the devil so we don't have to be afraid, we need to be aware but not afraid"

I remind myself she is only 6 don't take this over her head.

I kiss her goodnight and walk out of her room.

A silent prayer is lifted up asking God to protect them from Satan's schemes. Keep their eyes on Him throughout their life. Help us grow them strong in faith and mighty in spirit, teaching them the word and living the example for them.

I always pray that God will bless them, that they will continue to grow and lead people to Jesus...
but this prayer was different. This prayer was direct and God told my girl, to tell me, to ask Him for these things.

In Jesus name we pray... amen.

PS: The devil is getting stronger, pray for your children... all children.

school daze...

I really love being my children's teacher.

I was talking to a friend today telling her I can totally see the difference in my children when they are getting 100% of their momma.

When their days are scheduled, when there is purpose and they know what to expect.

It's what they crave and I love being able to give it to them.

Here are some photos I snapped this morning of us in our school daze...

Sophia snacking on some M&Ms doing her math work. We picked Saxon Math 1 (I didn't purchase K because I figured we could get more use out of 1) this year and I am so glad we choose this curriculum. I totally recommend it.



Troy sorting and then eating M&Ms (I love the possibilities in a bag of M&Ms... and the end result is so delicious!)





Sophia hard at work in one of her sensory boxes.
This one is filled with rice. About 7-10 objects are hidden inside and the object is to quietly and carefully so that none of the rice is spilled out, find what is hidden inside. Helps develop fine motor skills as well as assisting in sensory development.



This is Troy's learning poster. He is starting week 1 of 26, Brightly Beaming Steps to Reading. He knows the letters/shapes/number etc. already but I figured this would get him started with a more structured lesson, review what he already knew while adding lots of new material. He LOVED pretending he was a cow today and enjoyed the songs that went along with today's lesson. By the way- this is a free curriculum for anyone with preschool aged children, I did this same curriculum with Sophia and she LOVED it, it was fun reliving those memories today with Troy.

Oh and yes, the N in Martinez is missing, apparently this package of letters had every letter but N... uhm?

OVER AND OUT! :) The monsters are laying down reading/napping quietly and I'm going to enjoy a cup of coffee. Hope everyone is having a good Monday!

we try...

and things don't always work out right...



sometimes we have to try new ways...



sometimes we have distractions, things that try to get in our way...



but if we stick with it...



we discover...



that we can do it!!!

miserable failure...

the kind that puts a lump in your throat and a tightness in your chest...

the humbling failure that makes you fall on your face at His feet...

begging Him to right your wrong...

a momma sized failure...



A late night filled with joy and the spirit

They came in a bundle of excitement...

carefree and wild... just how I love them.

But I was tired and just wanted to fall into my bed...

that's not how it works for momma though.

As they ran down the hall applesauce, dirt and filth was the trail the left behind.

These feet I love coating with lotion and kiss before bedtime...

these tiny toes made a huge mess...



and I responded miserably...

I groaned and complained, I raised my voice and my emotions got the best of me...

call it what you will...

it was awful...

On my hands and knees wiping up mess while a curly headed boy stood by tears in his eyes and lip puckered...

sad at his momma's words and actions...

As I crawled along the floor wiping up the mess I found myself face to face with that little lip and tear filled eyes...

Oh God what have I done!?

I scooped him up quick but the damage was done...

That's the thing about words, once they are out they cannot be taken back in

I put him in the tub and fell on the ground in shame, face pressed the the ground in the bathroom of all places I prayed for God to take back...

He doesn't work that way though...

She always says "fragile hearts"

We must be so aware... ever present...

I must try harder...

I never want to forget...

I have to remember.

God, please help me remember.

my take on Tebow (don't hate me for it)

I am involved in the most amazing Bible study right now.

Beth Moore's "When Godly People Do Ungodly Things", the title is nothing new everyone falls short, everyone fails and through GRACE we can kneel at the foot of the cross and start over new... every single day.

We read last week in Hebrews how Jesus was temped in every way, but He never sinned. Of course He never sinned, He's Jesus.

Now, I'm going to switch gears here for a minute so try and follow me...
from Jesus to football.. well really Tim Tebow.

This fascination, call it Tebow Mania, Tebowism, whatever... many people love him or hate him you know who he is. I have seen photos pop up on my facebook feed of people 'Tebowing', status update after status update talking about what a great example Tebow is for our youth, for men, for Christians, for everyone.

I haven't commented a lot about him, because I wanted to make sure my words were clear, I've waited to say anything- I don't want to exalt this young man but I don't want to speak negatively of him either.

He truly does stand for something amazing and I believe God is using this young man to share the truth.

I read an article that said when Tebow wears '3:16' on his face 92 million searches on the world wide web searched the verse, John 3:16.

I believe God can use all of us for His glory and I'm proud and glad that people, maybe not being saved (only God can do that) but they are seeking because of the statement that Tebow desires to share.

That said, Tim Tebow is human, he sins just like all of us. He is tempted and he falls short. To put him on this pedestal like he is super human is not fair to him, most importantly to God. I cringe to think about the day Tim Tebow is involved in a sex scandal, accused of steroid use, faces DUI charges, paternity tests or even a much smaller issue- that I guarantee the media will blow up saying "ok Christians, look at your precious Tebow now!" How happy would Satan be, I promise Satan is working hard to see that man fall, publicly. I hope that doesn't happen but he is a young man, not young Jesus and he faces many temptations, being in the NFL I bet the temptations are far more than we could imagine.

I support the message he stands for, I think he has done a great job and I pray for him because I cannot imagine the pressure he is under. People have put him on a pedestal while others are waiting for him to fall.

When Tim Tebow, "Tebows" he is praying... the message is not to mimic a fun stance.. the message is to ask God for strength, courage and his will to be done, always in thankfulness, it is about God. Why is it easier for people to "Tebow" than to show hands folded in prayer?

Again, I am not hating on Tebow. These are just a few observations I've made that I think it is something to consider.

counting blessings...

Count your many blessings name them one by one,
Count your many blessings see what God has done,
Count your blessings, name them one by one...



Oh, so many blessings...

As I look around my home, I see them all of them... even the laundry and the dishes...

because...

this means we are going to sleep with our bellies full...



this means we will have dry, clean clothes in the morning...



this means they are learning...



this means they had a fun day...



this means they had a great day...




this means that he really loves me...

Welcome to Holland

I've heard mixed reviews about this poem but whenever I'm feeling blue it always lifts my spirits so I decided to share.

WELCOME TO HOLLAND
by Emily Perl Kingsley.

c1987 by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

be kind to yourself

I don't know about you but I have a way I like to do things, my plan for the day... and then the way the usually end up happening.

Mornings

My plan: Rise before the monsters, have a cup of coffee and sit quietly at my desk, reading my devotional, praying, then answering emails and maybe write a blog, then send Tony off for work and get the monsters their breakfast, dressed and time for their studies.

The way it happens: I am exhausted from staying up late, trying to get it all done, which I failed once again, the kids get up before me they watch Sponge Bob(which I hate), Tony kisses me and runs out the door with a cup of coffee that I didn't make him, I lay in bed, pray for strength to get through the day, then drag myself to the coffee pot, read my devotional between making frozen waffles for the kids and finding Troy a pair of matching socks, the kids fight, I send them back to bed and answer some emails. I look over at the clothes piled high on the couch and decide to go back and lay down until the coffee takes affect.

Sometimes I just feel like I can't get it together. I know other mommas feel the same way. I hear them come down hard on themselves for not getting it together quick enough in the mornings, for loosing their temper, for never getting the laundry completed, for the dirty dishes left in the sink... then I see their children's faces... smiling, clean, chubby cheeks running around the playground... proof of their job well done.

This morning as I ran around the kitchen, kicking myself for not getting up early enough to see my husband, I felt him kiss me before leaving but I didn't see him, mornings when my eyes are closed when he leaves are never good mornings. I rummage through the pots and pans from the night before, looking for a clean plate for Sophia's frozen waffles, I grabbed my devotional book off the desk... reading it while heating Troy's frozen sausage links. When I opened my devotional book this morning I felt God speaking right to me "Be Kind to Yourself" was the title.

"Be Kind to One Another, Tenderhearted, Forgiving One Another, Even as God in Christ Forgave You" -Ephesians 4:32

I read it and thought, oh this Max Lucado, he is confused... this verse is about being kind to others. Forgiving one another and treating each other with kindness and compassion as Christ does for us.

As I read on he talked about how can be so hard on ourselves, yet Christ forgave us, He knows even the worst things about us. Things that others wouldn't imagine. Yet, he loves us, He calls us His followers, His children. He instructs others to treat us with kindness, love one another... so why are we so hard on ourselves?

Pushing and trying to be better, yes. But- being hard on ourselves when it doesn't happen the way we planned? no.

So, it's 10am... the kids are still in their pajamas, I'm still in mine... we need to venture to the grocery store and do our school work... this day isn't going how I planned but that's ok.

Today, tell yourself it's ok, be kind to yourself.

New way of doing things...

I wrote this and questioned posting it. Often times I write drafts but never publish them to my blog... I didn't want to come off braggy or spoiled.. but as I reread it tonight I think it's worth sharing. During this difficult economic time it is hard to see families falling apart because of things of this world, we could have been one of those families but by the GRACE of an awesome God our hearts were transformed. This is part of our story and I decided to share...

Wow! How spoiled are we...

We have officially moved into the new place.

I have been impressed with us, making the much smaller living quarters work for our family.

The joy of being home owners and moving toward serious financial freedom has made the pitfalls of this transition so much easier.

A new way of thinking...

Although we would have loved to get all new stainless steel appliances for the house the reality was we had about $200 cash (not wanting to use credit) and needed an oven, microwave, refrigerator, washer and dryer...

I had just about figured out that we could get by with a fridge, microwave and washing machine for the first few months.

I have to brag on Tony because he really made some great finds...

microwave -$5
oven -$60
refrigerator -$75
washer and dryer -free (I think it did cost about $10 for the new tubing to make them work)
and $20 gas to pick up the great finds with my grandpa's truck.

I'm sure God had a hand in those great finds!! Call me crazy but I can totally see God in every facet of this move, the change in our thinking, the joy in the midst of something that before we would have responded with stress and question what we were thinking with this move- honestly we probably would have never even considered this move. How foolish we were.

I let the desires of this world influence my wants... quickly realizing that they might not be realistic. I returned a handful of items from some prior purchases and was able to purchase light fixtures for every room and a new fan to replace the one that didn't work in the living room as well a storage solutions and a few flowers for the front entrance that made the house feel like home.

Under bed storage has become my answer for most storage solutions in our new smaller space.

The pest issues.. not very grateful for that, but thankful that the spiders as big as my face are gone and we are still working on the roaches... palmetto bugs.. whatever they are called- they are creepy and gross.. now they come out dead or dying but I'll be glad when I don't see them anymore, ewww..

I just hope this cool weather stays until we can get the A/C guy out to let us know why the air conditioner won't turn on correctly.

All these little pitfalls would have seemed so overwhelming at one time.

I found myself lining the 28 year old cabinets thinking how much I missed my big kitchen, with the new clean built in stove top and custom cabinets.

God quickly transformed those thoughts into realizing the blessing of contact paper.. such an amazing material and really helped transform those old things.

While for a moment I considered the fact that my master bedroom could have easily fit inside my old bathroom... I found joy in the $avings of the small space and the low utility costs when compared to our big house.

I have found the joy in it all... from sharing a bathroom with the kids to being the dishwasher... it is true that it's good for the soul to wash dishes.

As Tony celebrated the victory of fixing the leak in the free washing machine I found myself thankful that we ran out of the wood floors and the soapy water mess was on my remnant vinyl floor (I got for $25) instead of the wood.

I love this house... this broken... old... little... house... that with a little work and a lot of love is becoming beautiful, maybe it's a lot of work and a lot of love...

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.
Colossians 3:15

for my very brave one

So often we focus on what is wrong,

we see the negatives,

we all do it,

the mountains seem so large sometimes,



so large we can't see what lies on the other side,

sometimes they seem to be all consuming,

but I challenge myself to see different.

To see the beauty in it all,



I hear the passion in her scream,

I see the tenacity in her personality,

the compassion in her gestures as she touches and talks to others.

My very brave one.



I see her like the Father,

acknowledging the struggle,

but not letting it cloud the view,

This life is hard sometimes but every day is a gift.

My desire is that we don't let the size of the mountain keep us from seeing the beauty.



And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. -Romans 8:28

first night in our house

Good Morning Everyone!

Last night was the first night we spent in our house. It was perfect! I slept like a rock, Tony right by my side, Sophia slept well (getting up only once) and Troy... well, he is still sleeping ;)

It really does feel like home, as much as we can feel like home on this earth anyway.

Now to put things where they belong... clean and settle in.

Only one big thing left to bring to the house, my craft hutch, I was waiting to find just the perfect place to put it. I think I've figured it out.. but need to empty some boxes first.

Most importantly I want to thank those of you who prayed for our sweet Sophia. :) She did great through her eye surgery yesterday. The staff at Shands were very kind and professional. The doctor believes the surgery was successful and so far it has proven successful, I'm amazed how great she is doing.. very little swelling and almost no bruising. She's tolerating the eye drops really well too, I was sure she would be freaking out about that. She gets 4-5 drops in her right eye 4 times a day for 5 days. Thanks again for your thoughts and prayers for our baby girl.

My Pops

I remember the days he used to out run me,

"to the fence and back", he'd say...

So strong,

he'd toss hay bails to the back of the old barn...

People said he didn't talk much,

I knew otherwise...

I've seen him laugh until he cried

and I've seen him cry until he had to walk away.

His salt and pepper hair is white with age,

I tell him it makes him look smarter.

He jokes about how slow he walks,

He told me today, he feels sometimes like he just gets in the way...

"never in the way, Pops", I tell him.

He laughs and I hear his voice crack on the other end.

He doesn't like that he can't beat me to the fence and back,

He doesn't like that now I lift the hay bails for him.

But not in the way... don't say that.

I'm not ready for that...

Although his body may not be, his heart is...

strong, good, wise.

I've always listened to his stories,

He's always liked telling them...

We don't run to the fence and back anymore,

We don't pull nails out of old boards anymore,

We don't build things together like we used too,

But he still tells the greatest stories...

So, we sit in the barn,

he talks and I listen.

I never want to forget his voice,

the way his scruffy face feels on my hand when I rub his cheek,

the smell of Old Spice and how he loves my peanut butter cookies...

how he will never take just one.

Never in the way...