doing great.. today

Some days I really do forget that Sophia has epilepsy. A blessing I am sure as some people don't have the break to forget things like this. She has been doing exceptionally well lately. She hasn't had any grand Mal seizures for quite a while, she hasn't had any behavioral seizures since the last one I wrote about, occasionally she spaces out but those are so hard to tell at this age.. she hasn't had any strange moments that give me that scared feeling like something is wrong... overall she is doing great. It is time spans like this when I want to take her off the medication and feel like it's all been a bad dream. I know that's not reality though. I have even been forgetting her medication, not good I know, not forgetting it all together but I've been late getting it to her the past couple days. She is supposed to get medicine every 12 hours and I have gone 14 or 15 hours the past couple days. I am making a point to get back on track with that though. She seems so strong I forget she can be so weak. Doing great for today, you never know what tomorrow will hold. I do feel the future is looking bright. I am thankful for that hope.
I was talking to Tony's mom the other day and she was asking me "remember this day..." I couldn't remember. Then she said "remember Sophia had a seizure that night"... bang! I remembered the day she was talking about. Isn't it funny how I remember days and events marked by seizures. Even Tony's mom, she remembered the event marked by that seizure. I remember, it was a ladies luncheon and Sophia was the little lady that day at the lunch. She wore a little sundress and enjoyed the company of everyone. Darla remembers her looking "flush" that day. I didn't recall. We had fun and enjoyed the company and that night she had a grand Mal seizure. I remember talking to our minister at church telling him what happened, he had popped into the luncheon and said how she seemed just fine earlier that day. That is what everyone who had seen her that day said. That's what we always say. She seems so fine. Even our neighbors say most of the time they forget that a seizure is even a risk for her. Then, bang.. it happens. It really is like a lightening strike. Unexpected.
I don't always forget. Sometimes I am reminded even when Sophia is "fine." Sophia participated in gymnastics last summer and this summer we were told that the gym didn't feel comfortable having her participate because of her seizures. Let's not forget that at age 2, it is still a parent child class and I would be with her the entire time. Not to mention the reason they gave was if she fell off the balance beam.. it's a two inch above the ground foam beam... not very dangerous. I even had a release form from the neurologist for the gym. Also, I remember some mom's in our neighborhood, earlier on in her diagnosis, not wanting their kids to play near Sophia in fear that her seizures might scare their kids. People are so ignorant.
I am finding that parents who have children with special circumstances are really touched by people wanting to know about their child's needs or illness. It almost makes parents feel like their is a reason, a purpose that their child is going through this. To raise awareness, concern, or just understanding. I have seen parents so thrilled to talk, over joyed that someone cares enough to ask. If you know someone who's child is going through something. Call them, ask them if their is something you can do, ask them about it, show concern. It really makes all the difference sometimes. Some days are harder than others and feeling that there is a reason can make all the difference in the world. I always tell Tony, someday Sophia may be a great neurologist and cure epilepsy because of all of this. ;) Or maybe, she will just spread awareness through her personal story. ;) Either way, this is our cross for a reason and we carry it well. :)