cleaning tip from the dirty kitchen of Holly :)

Yep, that's right... a cleaning tip! :)

In my quest to use less chemicals, I ran across this tonight and had to try it out, it worked great! Luckily I thought to take before and after pictures.. mostly because I was so excited and calling Tony to come and see and he wouldn't get up, apparently he doesn't share my excitement when it comes to cleaning the microwave. 

Here's how it goes... 

View dirty microwave...

2 cups of water, 1 teaspoon of vanilla extract, put in microwave for 5 minutes

remove bowl and wipe clean... really it's that easy. 

And the microwave smells yummy. I usually scrub with a Clorox wipe and then the first few things I cook/taste like lemon/bleach... not anymore! 

random summer blog

I really love NeedtoBreathe, like every song they have ever made! They are on my Pandora radio right now.

Speaking of music, praise team has been given two weeks off, I've seen a number of praise team members around town and we are all missing our fellowship with one another. What an awesome group of people who love God, love music and love praising Him, so glad to be apart of this ministry. Can't wait till next week when we resume our normal schedule!

I'm blogging in between researching and writing an essay for school, that is due at midnight... I call it multitasking... some might call it ADD

Tony's allergies are the worst they have ever been, don't know what  has him going but he's been snotty and coughing for a few days now... thinking we need another good rain to wash away whatever it is that has him clogged up.

We (me and the kids) went to the beach Monday with my friend, Jessica, too much fun and I love living in Florida! I have been missing holding a baby lately, maybe because lots of my friends are pregnant or just had babies, but I'll tell you at the beach I so enjoy having children! They run and jump and play and don't eat sand and sheltering them from the sun isn't a constant concern.

Fourth of July was great, we spent the day at the farm- cooking out and swimming, playing games and just being with family and close friends. Wouldn't you know I brought my camera and left it in the bag the whole time! Sophia has been begging for a camera, I'm half tempted to get her one just so I'll have pictures since I can't seem to remember to take them anymore!

I did contact the doctor regarding Sophia's seizure episode last week, he agreed that it was probably because of the change in her routine, although he did agree that such a relatively small change should not cause a break through seizure, that is the point of the medication, so when she comes in again he will order blood work to make sure her levels are therapeutic. She is due for an EEG and MRI in September, although I'm not thinking we will see a change in anything.

I haven't blogged much this summer, we've been outside living it up- or inside during the thunderstorms... either way we've kept busy, sometimes too busy. I remembered last week how quickly I forget that Sophia's medical needs are sometimes greater than I think- I mean why can't she go to reading camp in the morning come home take a nap and then hit VBS at night? She is good for me, she reminds me to slow down... and then sometimes I remind her.

My trouble now is when we are inside, slowing down, I'm not near as productive. I told myself come July I would start getting up early and getting myself back in the school routine.. since I slacked all of June- sleeping in and wearing pajamas as long as I could get away with it, but that July 1st deadline has come and gone and I'm still sleeping in and wearing pajamas as long as I can get away with it.. but Monday- Monday is the day I begin breaking the bad habit of sleeping until the kids need breakfast!

Don't laugh- well I know you are going to... Tony bought me... 'The Brazilian Butt Lift' I had been wanting it and he surprised me with it last week. I haven't cracked it open yet (get it butt lift, cracked it open, ahaha) but Monday- Monday is the day!

I'm going to need lots of prayers come Monday!

Did I mention that I found a farm, a farm to get organics from! Beef, pork, chicken, eggs, etc.  We have always purchased about 70% of our food organic but now, now I have found a cost effective, supporting local farmers, kinda way to eat organic and I am shouting it from the roof tops! Also, we are apart of an organic produce co-op so that makes getting produce way easier and affordable too.

So from NeedtoBreathe to organic food... you have been somewhat updated on the happenings around here, I'm off to love on the big sneezing guy in my bed who probably has toilet paper stuffed in his nostrils, so attractive don't ya think!?

answered prayers

Tonight our Sophi girl had what we believe to be a complex partial seizure, 

she's had this type of seizure before... 

it lasted about 12-15 minutes,

nothing new, just been awhile since we've seen one.

We'll get with the neurologist tomorrow and review the events from tonight 

but this has been a busy week and may just have been too much for our girl. 

Sleep schedule has been a little wonky, which means her medicine schedule has been a little off, not by much but maybe enough to cause a break through seizure? 

I don't know, we'll let the doctor determine that.

The reason I wanted to share though... for prayers of course, for the doctor and any tests he may or may not order, but most important, 

I have to share a lesson... you see today I was grumpy, tired and was ready for the kids to go to bed, I called out to God tonight, Lord give me strength to get these kids in bed!

I meant it but not in that prayerful kind of way more of a short tempered, I'm ready for this night to be over kind of way.. and then this... 

and as she struggled in the midst of a storm 

she would scream for me to hold her, 

then cry that I was holding her too tight, 

shivering and shaking that she was going to throw up, 

laying with her face on the side of the toilet.. 

you know what she did?

she prayed...

God please make this stop, 

let me just go to sleep, 

take away my hurt tummy and just let me go to sleep

Please God I'll do anything if you just make it stop

Through my tears, I kiss her damp hair and I pray with her 

because in that moment there is nothing else I can do. 

I sit on the floor with her, holding her close but not to tight

She tells me I sound far away

I'm right here baby.

God just let her know I'm right here.

During these seizures she is conscious but disorientated, 

she screams that I'm not close enough but I'm standing next to her

She cries in pain and that she is going to throw up but she's not sick

It is the most helpless feeling for this momma

So I pray...

I feel her heart rate slow down, the shivering and shaking subsides 

and in a matter of moments it's over.

She asks for me to carry her to bed and I sing a few songs

and her prayers for sleep are answered.

What an example of faith and peace that only comes for our Heavenly Father, 

she knows He is peace in the midst of the storm.

Oh, how much I learn from this baby, thank you God for blessing our family with her

and no more shouting to God for strength, at least not strength to get the kids to bed... 

just a boy and his cars...

a boy and his cars... 

 no cares in the world... 

 and then comes in a woman....

 she will will fix it (even though nothing needs fixed)

 he is patient for a while

 and then she tells him his boy cars need wives... 

that girl has 'fixed too much' and it's just a boy and his cars... 

looking up

People with special children know that no matter how many amazing people you know who have special children the challenges to each child are unique. While the diagnosis may be the same the struggles can be far different.

For the most part I am content and at peace, then every now and again I find myself standing in that dark and lonely place, feeling sad for my child, sorry for myself, feeling like no one understands and well... like God let me down.

It is the devil that would love to flood my mind with these negative thoughts.It's the human, fleshly side of me that lets these feelings come to surface, it's these feelings I would like to never pluck out on a keyboard, they are yucky and don't make me feel proud of myself as a child of God.

But it is these moments in suffering when I also find humility, encouragement and resolution in the words of my Savior.

It is these 'yucky' moments when I find myself on my knees and looking up...

Looking to the Father, the ultimate physician, healer, redeemer... my God.

And while I come to the cross, this broken, spoiled rotten, no good human... He has the power to pick me up and remind me who I am, whose I am and what my purpose is.

I was reminded just last week in a devotional that it is key for Christians to take the precious words from scripture keep them ready when troubles and temptation comes...

Here are some of the verses that I cherish when I find myself face on the ground at the cross on this day...


Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. Matthew 11:28-29



I am leaving you with a gift, peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don't be troubled or afraid. John 14:27


And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28



For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11


and my favorite the one I share with my special gift from God...

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:14

honor and obey

Reading through this black and white composition notebook that I jotted down hundreds of different quotes and thoughts from the my get-away a few weeks ago...

I was trying to pick another one to share with you all... and since it came up in conversation this weekend I figured it's a good one to share with you all today....

The difference between honoring and obeying.... 

Watch out now! Those are two heavy words that I really don't like using... maybe it's my issues with authority... growing up these kind of words would make me run the opposite direction, kind of like the word submission (I'll save that for blog of it's own), back to the point... honor and obey....

Obey is the action and Honor is an issue of the heart

I scribbled this down in my notebook and put a big star next too it, I knew it was something I would need to come back to for myself and my children... they share their mother's authority issues 

(remember caught not taught). 

Children are called to obey their parents

Colossians 3:20 says, "Children obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord"

Now I can't be the only one who has told my children. "the Bible says you are to OBEY your parents...."

Go to your room, 

pick up your toys, 

don't talk mean to your sister, 

be nice to your brother, 

get your finger out of our nose... 

on and on and on.... 

And when they listen.. this my friends is the action of obeying. 

but I don't want my children just to obey me, following my commands as a sort of dictator (well, yes sometimes that is nice), I want them to understand my words are teaching them something, out of love I am teaching them, yes telling them to stop picking their nose is down out of love.... but I want my children to honor me. 

Honor comes from the heart and yes, 

children are called to honor their parents; 

Ephesians 6:2 says, "Children honor your father and mother" 

While I can tell my children to go pick up their toys and most likely they will do it... but will they put their things away orderly with an attitude that honors you as their parents or are they slamming things into drawers, huffing and puffing about what you have asked of them?

I told my six year old, "I am glad you obey me, but I want you to honor me too." 

This word, honor, is not one I thought of as having a place in everyday conversations with my children, 

I'm realizing just how necessary it is though.

Are we not called to obey and honor our Heavenly Father?

Now, the hard part, are you leading by example? 

not just obeying but honoring your Earthly parents? 

how about your Heavenly Father?

If  you ask me to obey part is easy...

Honoring comes from within, it's the emotion in which we obey. 

And we are always leading them by example. The best example I can give my children is for my heart to honor God and my parents as they ask me to obey.... big gulp.. as that was even a bit hard to pluck out on the keyboard (these authority issues may be bigger than I realized). 

Just another thought from the black and white composition notebook, 

I figured someone else may need to receive this message just as much as I did... 

caught not taught

Last week I spent two days away from my loves and nurtured my mind and spirit.
I was reminded how sometimes we need to "put the oxygen mask on ourselves, so that we can protect the ones we love the most" 

No doubt that the Lord blessed this gathering of his faithful followers as the joined together to learn, share triumphs and failures, encouragement and skills with one another.
This was for homeschool parents, but no doubt in my mind all parents would have felt empowered and encouraged by the words that filled the air.
During the next few weeks I plan on making time to sit down and pluck out some of the encouragement that I received during this weekend... figure why not share the joy! I hope you find encouragement and share it with others as well...


And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near. -Hebrews 10:24-25

So to kick off... 

I'd like to begin with one of many quotes I jotted down in my black and white composition notebook....

"Most things are caught, not taught"

This can be from multiple arenas... what are your kids learning at school, church, work, with their peers, or with you? 

Oh, nelly... this hits home to me. You see our house is loud! I have vivid memories in the not so distant past, screaming at the top of my lungs "stop yelling!"

It's almost comical to think about, thinking about all the times I scream at my children to 'be quiet, use your inside voice'.... 

The rationale, is that I need to be louder than they are (which is very loud) 

but where did they learn to be loud? their momma. 

You see, my man, he hates loud yelling... when he comes home from work the thing the bugs him the most is when I am stressed and fussing at kids, I always wondered why it was when Daddy raises his voice everyone in the house stops, even the dog. 

Yet, I yell all day long and no one listens... that's just it you see, Daddy never yells, so when he does all eyes are on him because there is a reason for it. 

When I yell.. it's just another day in the life... or so it used to be. 

The first thing my daughter said when I got back, mommy your voice is different.... I have had those words stuck in my throat for the last week.. hard to swallow those words.. but thankful that she noticed her momma will fix it when she's been wrong. 

While I was away I had time to think, clear my mind, be filled with good thoughts and some humbling ones too...

Be easy on yourself, we all make mistakes, but we also are all offered the opportunity to start a new day... another resounding message at the convention "God's mercies are new everyday, somewhere on Earth, it's a new day... so start over now!"

I thought about the things I don't like that happens in my home... the humbling part, what I don't like... starts with me. 

So while I teach them to speak kindly to one another, they catch what I'm throwing out... and that, gulp, isn't always kindness....

So, remember most things are caught, not taught... what are you throwing? what are they catching?

schoolroom renovation!!

When we moved into this house... this was the schoolroom (to be)

Formerly a little boys race car room, the walls were terribly dirty and there was no floor, the closet doors were broken and one side was missing... complete disaster zone, perfect for me to renovate!

We moved in during Christmas break and there was SOOO much to be done that the schoolroom got put on the back burner, the floors were put in and the boarder was some what removed, but once the school supplies and students were put in place there wasn't much time for renovation, 

so this was our school room this year... 

 

The end of the school year which we planned on celebrating with our beach vacation that ended up being a stay-cation and for Tony a work-cation... resulted in the schoolroom renovation!!! 

Here is our new schoolroom... there are still a few things left to do but I couldn't wait a moment longer to post pictures!!!

I still need to add window treatments but the white blinds are serving their purpose for now. 

I love the closet doors Tony put in today... 

Tony is hanging the dry erase board and the supply holders as I type, but like I said I'm too excited to wait!!

I can't wait till next year!!! 

These are the work boxes I've been working on, art, playdoh, letter writing, tag readers, scissors and glue, etc. Everything has a place and everything in it's place! 

Oh and this nifty paper roll and holder I snagged at Ikea for all of $13

And I will post more pictures when the decorations are up... 

I love it! 

And so do the kids, they are so excited! 

Sophia asked if we really had to have summer vacation now that the schoolroom is done. 

summer vacation, not so much...

I never thought I'd be writing these words, that's for sure.... 


I went to a Christian homeschool conference this past weekend and one of the many things I learned about was the differences of sheltering your children and choosing solid Christian influences for your children to be around while they are developing their character and their virtues; it's it funny how God knows just what we need before we know we need it. 


Friday and Saturday was the conference, Sunday was church, Monday we left for vacation... 


Every year we stay at the same small family owned seaside cottages. This year I thought I'd change things up and I booked us at a big resort at a different beach. We spent all two hours there and after about the first ten minutes I knew we couldn't stay. Tony and I kept looking at each other, thinking the same thing but neither one of us wanted to break the news to the kids. 


I sure didn't think that lesson I learned at the conference was going to cost us our vacation... 


Against our better judgement we checked into the room, leaving our belongings in the car we told the kids we were going to just check it out. We knew the kids would be disappointed... we explained to them (as best we could to a four and six year old) that the people staying in the hotel weren't very polite and it wasn't very safe for us to stay here. We told them that we understood why they were angry and sad but that mommy and daddy were making the best and hard decision to just go back home. I walked the halls singing in my head "this place is not my home I'm just passing through, the angels beckon me from heavens open doors and I can't feel at home in this world anymore" When we got in the car the kids were disappointed but they knew we made the right and safest decision for them to leave. It was for their safety and their hearts we don't want them hearing bad language or being exposed to things that could harm them. 


The resort didn't wan't to refund our money, apparently the adult environment and the guests being worldly influences on our young children is not a good enough reason for them to refund the money. But more than that I'm just thankful to be home, thankful my babies are tucked in their beds safe, thankful my man is here to lead us through the tough choices that have to be made sometimes, thankful that God answered my prayers to keep our spirits up and we ended the day with pizza and family togetherness. 


We talked a lot about how people have different rules in their lives and we all choose to do things differently, some to honor God and some to not, God gives us all a choice, Troy said, "mommy, I can't wait to get to heaven, I bet they even have trampolines there" sweet guy! 


And then tucking my girl into bed she prayed to God thanking him for her good mommy and daddy who knew to bring her home from that 'dirty hotel', oh I love them! 


So thankful I can call them mine! 

is it possible I'm the only one...

who hates the ice cream truck?

I hear that horrid 'It's a small world' music being played a few streets over... as it gets louder and louder I just pray my monsters don't notice it... 

it's unmistakable... 

and what I am thinking that they won't notice it!?

that yellow and white truck with sugary, high fructose corn syrup injected, brain freeze giving  ice cream on board...

it never fails, they notice and they remind me of that one time their daddy chased down the ice cream truck so they could buy some over priced, empty calorie snacks... I hate it! 

How about some organic apple slices instead?

I am certain my blood pressure rises and I feel my heart beat go from resting to feeling as if I've just run a marathon... 

The kids scramble, begging me for ice cream, they know the answer but they ask anyway... 

The stupid truck stops in front of our house and waits.. waits... it seems as though he turns the music up to full blast as he sits on the road in front of our house. 

The kids dumping out their piggy banks trying to convince me they have enough money for the $4 popsicle that I am certain will make their tummies hurt 1/2 way through. 

No, thanks! 

Ice cream man.. keep on driving! 

And only because I find this super funny! 

How's this for ya, Ice Cream Man!! 

Muahahaha (evil laugh) 

always right...

He is always right... maybe it's the years... but he's always right...

He told me, "Baby everyone does the best they can with the tools they have. You can't build fine furniture with just a hammer, but bet your bottom dollar people are gonna try. We all do the best we can with the tools we have. As we grow we acquire more tools and we put them away in our toolbox, we may not use them for a long time, they might get rusty but we've still got 'em. Sure I might could build far better furniture with your tools, but if I don't ask for your help I've gotta use what I've got. It's all about what you do with what you got and barrowin' and learnin' from what's in the toolbox of those folks around ya"

Well, he's right again. :)

I dream of...

I homeschool.

A statement I never thought I would make. 

Ask me about me 10 years ago and I never imagined I would be a homeschooling parent. 

My how time changes things. 

I also never imagined I would be homeschooling a special needs child. 

The victories outweigh the challenges, most days. 

I find comfort, confidence and strength in homeschooling my own. 

I have challenged myself in ways I never imagined possible and no doubt I've found myself flat on my face asking God for the strength because I knew I couldn't do it without him. 

They are a gift God gave to me. They are His children and He entrusted them to me during this time they spend on Earth, I take this gift serious and in all things I do what I believe is best for them. 

I also know homeschooling is not for everyone. 

But it is for us. 

I do have days, days when I dream about the school bus driver, thank you MckMama for that. 

But like I said before I never imagined I would homeschool a special needs child... and for those of us with special needs children, we know the struggles that can occur in the school system for our exceptional children and in honor of those of us homeschooling special needs children... 

I dream of the school bus driver no more- now, 

I dream of.... 

the occupational therapist...

(or physical therapist or maybe even speech therapist, but this season in our lives it's the occupational therapist)

When I see that white car pull into our driveway I feel the peace come over me. 

Not only does this mean help with my wild woman but it means for the next two hours there will be another adult in my house...

Another person to keep a watchful eye...

an adult to love on and support my girl...

another person to help get through the tasks of the day that can seem so overwhelming to my girl... 

someone who understands that her loud voice and inability to focus is not because she is choosing to misbehave...

someone who recognizes the small triumphs...

a person who my daughter loves spending time with...

our OT is the one I dream of. 

It can be a lonely road homeschooling a special needs child, it isn't something all homeschooling parents understand... I notice the strange looks when I talk about creating a multi-sensory environment and concern with the development of fine motor skills, but this is our life and I wouldn't change a thing... except maybe our OT would come five days a week instead of two. 

Thanks Miss Denise, we love you!!! 

10 things....

1. Today I thought homeschooling might be the death of me. It was one of those days when no one wanted to follow directions, keep focused or do much of anything (including myself). But we got through it, discipline is important and homeschooling has taught me there is little room for laziness. Maybe some would have given into the day but I like to view days like today as opportunities to lead by example and even when we don't feel like doing certain things we all have responsibilities and need to discipline ourselves to get the job done. (And that doesn't happen all the time either- but it was that thinking that spurred me forward to encourage the kids to get it done and do it well!)

2. I love reading with my little man, we have been reading lots of his books lately. I need to get him to the library to check out some books but we have an enormous fine (yes, I am one of those people!) and I can't ever seem to remember to carry cash to pay it. Maybe we'll do that this afternoon. Imagine this, I lost a book, well, two books... one of them "Homeschool and Organization", ironic huh?

3. I have replaced one meal a day with vegetables. I have always hated veggies, realizing what a contradiction this was, as I harp on my children about eating their veggies, I have replaced one meal a day with all veggies, usually it's lunch but last night it was dinner I had fresh squash and green beans cooked in the skillet, today for lunch I had steamed broccoli with feta cheese. The kids are even joining in too, sometimes!

4. I am the worst about checking my voice mails on my phone, if I could disable my voice mail I would. I usually wait until my voice mailbox is full and then I have no choice but to check them. There was a time when I left my mailbox full so that no one could leave new messages, then I discovered they still could leave messages the mailbox would just delete the oldest message and replace it with a new one. I've been trying to keep up with it better and this morning I checked my mailbox and I only had 5 old messages... that's a record people!

5. I've been reading a book called 'Secrets of Solitude' and it is changing my heart. No doubt in my mind God sent this book to me at just the right moment in my life. I love how He speaks to us that way.

6. My friend had to put her dog down last week and I cried because I missed Molly, Lucy, Tater-Tot... dogs really are man's best friend.

7. Sophia and I took off for a 'Mother/Daughter Day'. It didn't turn out quite how I had planned but we had fun. It's always nice to get to enjoy her. The boys were supposed to go see a movie but they ended up working on the never ending 'Honey Do List', there is something great about seeing my man hanging doors and changing air vents. There were about one hundred other things that I needed to get done but I am so glad I took time to enjoy that girl. She's growing  up so fast. I adore her!

8. I am so ready for the home school convention at the end of this month. It will be the longest I will have been away from the kids, I think ever... silly I know but Thursday till Sunday is a long time! I'm looking forward to it though, good community, education, fellowship and lots of encouragement.

9. The song, "He's Mine" by Rodney Atkins gives me butterflies thinking about what Troy is going to be like when he's bigger. He is so wild. A few months ago a cop pulled onto our road. I was raking leaves, Troy was riding his bike and there was a stray dog on the other side of the road. The officer rolled down his window and asked Troy, "Is that your dog, son?" Troy bowed up his little chest, and  in this very deep voice said, "no, you gonna arrest me now?" The officer laughed rolled up his window and drove away... I just kept raking leaves and praying for that curly headed little mess riding his bike along the sidewalk.

10. Sophia is gluten free! That's the latest buzz in our house. The doctor suggested that we try it, the OT suggested it may help with some of her sensory and attention problems. They said considering her mother and brother had Celiac Disease and we already eat gluten free it's worth a try. She may not have Celiac but it may be affecting her in a different way, possibly neurologically. So we are supposed to give it two weeks and see if we notice a difference. I think Troy is enjoying that Sophia can't eat cookies and crackers anymore, misery loves company. This afternoon I am going to make some GF treats for them. Sophia has begun OT twice a week now, they come to our house and she really likes her "therapists".  After her OT appointment last week we went to "chick-a-lay" for lunch and she told the guy behind the counter, "My therapy went really well today." I just laughed.. what to do!? She's a hoot! I wonder what he thought. Keeps life interesting that is for sure.

Why no blogs since March?

Recently I made my blog, public on facebook, mostly so friends and family could keep up with what we were up too. We have many family members who live far away and for them I like to share photos and stories. It was then that I realized how many people I was putting myself out there too. People I hadn't spoken with in years were reading about my family and many of them because they care but others for other reasons. I have since removed that facebook option. I will still share our lives on my blog, but I will continue to do so but with much more discretion. You see the new age of social media makes my head hurt. I want my children to feel emotions not learn to show 'emocions'. I want to led by example that thank you notes should be handwritten and sent in the mail, not a status update on facebook. Invitations should be directed to those you love and care about, not mass emails to whoever will show up. The privacy of this life is being stripped away and God has spoken to my heart that this is important to my family. It may be a far cry from the days of my blogs when I spoke about transparency and being real, but I ask you to understand that my thoughts are clear and being real isn't blogging about a dirty kitchen... or laundry piled on the couch, we all have that. Being real is sharing my convictions, my heart and how God is working in our lives. I'm not sure what will come of my blog, like I said, I love sharing, I love the quiet time my blog provides me with to reflect but I am learning that I don't have to do this over a keyboard for everyone to see.

contentment

on a good morning....

i am up with the sun, waking walk across the hall into the school room and wrap myself in the cozy throw blanket, walk down the hall into the kitchen make a cup of coffee while I read my morning devotional...

then i make breakfast for my man, who is already in the shower getting ready for a hard day at work...

the oldest hears daddy getting ready and wakes up bright and joyful ready to start her day...

with breakfast on the table the kids and i share plans for the day...

tony heads off to work and the kids and i begin our chores and schooling for the day...

NOT!!!

It never happens this way, maybe once a month, twice if something really exciting is going on...

It never happens this way!!

And to be honest.... I don't want it too.

I get it, some of you are morning people, you wake up and your morning is blessed by making breakfast and morning devotionals, gathering your thoughts and plans for the day before the busy begins....

me... I'm a night owl, maybe it was the year and a half I worked night shift 7pm-7am but I am a night person. I go to bed around 12 or 1am, I like to wake up about 8....

no one in my house likes to eat breakfast, so why would I get up slave away in the kitchen when Tony says breakfast too early makes him nauseous, Troy is like me and if he is allowed will sleep well past 9am and Sophia is more than content with a bagel with cream cheese!?

As far as morning devotionals go... devotionals are important. Whoever, put the word morning in front of devotional wasn't thinking about us night people... and I'm certain there are people like me out there... most mornings I can't remember how to make a cup of coffee much less read a morning devotional, too much thinking in the morning gives me a headache... I want to read a devotional when I'm good and awake, ready to absorb those heavenly words... not when I'm rubbing crust out of my eyes, I usually read my devotional at night when the house is quiet and their isn't any pressing chores to do.

So, how do our mornings go?

Well, let's start with the nights....

I like doing laundry, dishes and those chores at night. So typically, we have dinner no one cleans the kitchen right away- that time is reserved for family. Tony rolls on the living room floor with the kids or they watch a special show, tonight it was a Discovery documentary about sea creatures, the boys watched it while Sophia and I sang songs in her bed and played with her guitar. Then I fight them to brush their teeth before bed and we end every night with their special lullabies and prayer. While I'm doing that Tony is normally taking a shower. Once the kids are in bed that is quality time for me and Tony, we spend a few hours, till around 10 together, talking about our day, watching movies, then off to sleep he goes. That is when I have my "5am Time" about 10pm every night. I read a devotional, get online to check emails, blogs, whatever. Then the chores begin, I pick up the kitchen, laundry and enjoy the quiet of the house. This is my favorite time of day, knowing my family is home, everyone is safe, peaceful quiet time.

Then come morning, my guy wakes up his coffee is set for him... I don't have to get up and make his breakfast for him to know I'm thinking of him, I usually write him a love note right before I go to sleep wishing him a good day.

The only thing about the above story that is true- is that Sophia does usually hear Tony getting ready and she always wakes up bright and happy ready to start her day.
She is my early bird, she normally will get herself breakfast and doing some learning activities on the computer- she likes this time in the morning. Tony tells me she flits around enjoying it being just the two of them.

I usually wake up around 8am as Tony is running out the door. I used to scold myself for this, not being up and dressed to see him out... but I realized a while ago and I'm realizing more and more everyday... all families are different... so often in our culture with social medias documenting and publizing every area of our life (yes, just like my blog) we so easily fall victim to comparing ourselves with others and some of us victim to thinking our way is best.

Oh, she does this and she does that... her way is better... I love learning new ways and sometimes something someone else does is good and it may work better... but I don't believe it is healthy or necessary to put "good" and "right" in a box when it comes to our families...

Families do what works best for them. For my family, for me, momma sleeping in till 8am does a world of good for everyone. In another season in my life I'm sure getting up early may be my thing... but right now, I'm striving from contentment. I'm happy to have my "5am Time" at 10pm.

the happenings around here...

There is so much going on these days, I feel like I barely get finished with one day and another one is only hours away...

I enjoy it though, I must say I like the fast pace... don't get me wrong I like lounging around in my pajama's just as much as the next person but I enjoy spending days with family and friends, housework, homework, raising children... I love all that makes up this busy life.

Tonight my guy played a little on the guitar. It's been a long time since he has pulled out that guitar and played for us. I love that the kids don't even ask for the television to be turned on when Daddy is playing... they dance around and enjoy the sound. Hearing him play the guitar reminds me that this life doesn't have to be near as complicated as we sometimes make it out to be.



Everyone has been asking me about Miami... our trip has come and gone. It went well, exhausting, but good. Tony drove down with us and he stayed one night and left the following evening. The kids and I stayed until Friday. We juggled our time between visiting with family and taking Sophia to the many doctor's appointments that were lined up for that week. We really liked the doctor and Sophia was more than comfortable in Miami, in fact, she cried when we had to leave. We were driving in crazy traffic one morning and I said, "Who in there right mind would want to live her? What is so great about this place? and Why is everyone in such a hurry?" (way to be positive huh? hey- we all have our moments)Sophia squeals in the backseat, "This is the greatest city ever, they are in a hurry because it's MIAMI!!!" The appointments all went great and we learned a lot about how Sophia's brain works, how she processes information and the affects her seizures have had on her development... altogether she is a bright, witty, affectionate six year old who is the light of her momma's life and still has her Daddy wrapped tight around her little finger.



Troy on the other hand is not so thrilled with Miami. I felt pity on the poor guy most of the week. He rarely smiled... partly due to the horrible allergies he was struggling with (he was allergic to my cousin's dog, Tank, in the picture above) so that made it tough for him. But even more down because in Miami, "there is no forest and no dirt" You know what Troy loves... dirt... and forest.. a life without the forest and the dirt isn't a life worth living, in Troy's mind anyway. Before we even got home my mom had a load of clay delivered to her house, just for Troy (and she says I spoil him)and the day after we got home Troy spent two days at the farm, in the forest and dirt.



So, that's that.. just wanted to catch up since it has been awhile.

funniest. thing. ever.

Troy is right now, at this exact moment, in the shower singing...

"All the single ladies, all the single ladies, I love all the single ladies... shake your booty, shake your booty yea yea.. show 'em how ya do it now!"

I can hear him stomping around in their with his buzz lightyear toy singing his heart out.

Loving this!!

soooo over this...

Why is it young children are obsessed with bodily functions?

Now maybe my daughter gets it from the influence of her younger brother, because I cannot for the life of me imagine she would come up with these things on her own...

we've had a lot of sickness going around our house in the last few weeks, which may have spurred their new found interest in bodily functions

Either way... they are discovering bodily functions everywhere and telling me all about it.

They found a tissue box at the pediatricians office that gave all kind of facts about snot and as long as we waited to see the doctor that day we read and reread all of those facts over and over again, which only spurred their interest.



From sneezing, burping, tooting, spitting, urinating, pooping even crying... if it comes out they want to know who? what? where? when? and why?

They want me to "come and see" every time they blow their nose, go to the bathroom or spit on the ground.

This is one part of raising these monsters that I am not enjoying....



The only good thing about it all, they are gaining a whole new understanding of why we wash our hands!

well, Sophia just blew her nose... gotta "come see this!"

who me? not me?

Hey, what are you doing?

Oh cool, me? I'm hiding.

From the kids. I'm in the bathrooom, well, the shower to be honest...

No, I'm not taking a shower, I'm hiding in the shower, with my cell phone and a bag of cookies and Sophia's silly putty.

I just need a moment and this is the only place they won't find me.

Oh sheesh.. I gotta go Troy is calling me...

planting new roots

It's different here lately.

New air circulating (and I don't mean our repaired A/C)

There is a feeling in our home, a presence that wasn't there before...

it was there just not as strong as it is today.

My husband leading our family, spiritually speaking, it has relieved me, I am able to serve my family, my husband and my children in a new way, better, more Biblical way. I'm not doing the job that he was supposed to do, I have relinquished that to him, that is his role and his job and it feels so good to have a partner in it all.

I was planting flowers a few days ago and I was contemplating our new roots.



As the kids rode their bikes around the cul-de-sac, I heard them laughing and playing with each other.

Tony was at work and I was home, making a home.

It isn't really what I never imagined I would do, I never thought I'd be a wife or a homeschooling mom who was an involved in her church, have a relationship with my Savior that I have today.

I thought I would love God, I thought I would have children (at some point), I wanted to be a flight nurse, a professional, do amazing things, visit far away places... and sometimes I dream, it's fun to dream, but their is no where I would rather be.

And as for amazing things... I think I witness amazing things everyday, in the lives of my children, myself, my husband, the community around me, the good in people, the God in people, I do see amazing things.



Back to working in the yard...

As I prepared the soil for the new plants, as I raked away leaves, dug my hands into the Earth I began to sift through the dirt.

I found roots from things planted before, they were dead and dry, I tossed them into a pile

Sometimes it was hard work pulling those old roots, they were planted deep.

As I was preparing the ground, preparing to plant new roots, bright and alive...

I thought about how in our own life, in our hearts and our minds we must uproot the things from before, the old, the dead and dried up- what our life was

and we must prepare our hearts and minds for the new, bright and alive.


Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come; The old has gone, the new is here! (2 Corinthians 5:17)

everyday moments...

Sophia was "training" the dog today.

Remember Mt. Laundry, the never ending mountain of laundry??

Today Sophia was squealing in delight as she had "trained" the dog to climb the mountain...

What mountain you ask?

Mt. Laundry of course.

Nothing like a 6 year old to humble you...

she then informed me that "Jazzy-Bell was far to scared to stay on the top of the mountain because it is way too tall, but she did go up and down"

Yep, humbled...

you know what I'm am doing tonight? Folding :)

hard part

Today was ruff day, no pun intended ;)

We miss Molly girl, even though we didn't get to see her everyday as we couldn't steal her away from the farm, knowing she's not running down the dirt road to swim in the water trough on a hot day makes me sad.

There is a running joke in our family that when a tradegy strikes mom won't tell us kids until weeks later. From the time we were little it's been this way.

When my pony died when I was little, she told me for weeks that he was on the other side of the property.

When my dog died she tried for days to tell us that she was down at the barn.. failing to mention she was buried at the barn.

Even when our great grandma died, she didn't tell us until after the funeral, she wrote it under 'deaths' in our bible and handed it back to us during the communion at church.

She just has never been good at passing on bad news... if we weren't there to hear about it right away she didn't tell us, not right away anyway.

So, when mom called me this morning she said, "I know you say I never tell you, so I'm telling you..." and the tears came I knew... she didn't even have to say it. I knew Molly wasn't going to make it.

It's ok mom, you don't have too...

As I gathered myself I knew I was going to have to face my own sweet ones and let them know Molly had died.

I tried three times to walk out of my room, down the hall to the living room where they were watching cartoons.

Three times I turned back and sat on the bed, crying...

and then laughing.. thinking to myself... this is why she didn't tell us.

I could seriously go about my day and just not tell them.

But I did... they met me down the hall and before I could even finish the sentence Sophia said, "Molly died huh!?"

Yes baby, she didn't make it.

Sophia melted onto the floor crying and Troy just stood there finally saying, "Today is a berry sad day Momma"

Lots of tears shed for a really great dog today.

And tonight I tucked them in and Sophia started to cry again and I thought...

yep, this is why she wouldn't tell us... she wanted us to be happy all the time...

sweet momma, we all laugh at you but I understand.. it is the hard part.

"it's a berry sad day"

I'd like to believe that there is a special place in heaven for the great dogs.

We lost a great dog today.

The injuries were too great and she fought hard, her wagging her tail until the last days, our sweet Molly girl.



She was a good girl and will be missed very much.

Troy said it best, "it's a berry sad day"

something to pray for

Some exciting things are happening in the life of our girl.

I don't want to share just yet but I am asking you to be in prayer for a big trip we are taking at the end of this month.

It's just me and the kids, I'm a bit nervous about traveling alone with them, being away from Tony for a whole 6 days (not my thing).

But I know this will be good, my mom says it's an answer to prayers.

I'm not ready yet to post the who/what/where/when and why but I will say that the last few days have been peaceful ones and we are preparing our hearts and our minds for the days ahead.

"Sophi-girl" is a blessing to our home. I treasure her, although I don't always understand her. She is stronger than she knows, stronger than most people realize. Her life, very the first moments challenged me to accept that things won't always go my way, my plan may not be His plan and that is ok.

With this trip we are seeking options, answers and understanding.

A second opinion so to speak... it will be good. It's going to be good.

Tonight I'm nervous, I've been peaceful and I'm hoping that peace returns.

Asking for prayers.

"what are you wearing?"

I called my husband today and asked, "Hey babe, what are you wearing?"

He laughed and I could tell there were people in the room as I realized what I had just asked him...

he responded with a serious tone, "khaki's and blue shirt"....

Yes, life sure has changed...

reason I was asking...

I was I was trying to determine if I should wait and wash his work clothes now or when he gets home... darks or lights that is the question. :)

no carb, no gluten pizza

I got this one from pinterest.
I've been wanting to make it for a while. I don't know why but I thought it was going to be time consuming... wasn't at all!
Tony says we will be eating this one for dinner at least once a week.
For those who know Tony he often does a low carb diet to shed unwanted pounds, usually it isn't too hard to find recipes that are low carb and gluten free but until now pizza was a no go when he was doing low carbs...

So whether your gluten free or carb free this one is a keeper.

For the crust:
1 (8 oz.) package of full fat cream cheese (room temp.)
2 eggs
Freshly ground black pepper
Garlic powder
1/4 cup grated parmesan cheese

For the pizza:
1/2 cup jarred marinara sauce*
1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
Sauteed pepperoni
or whatever you like on your pie

How to bake:
Preheat oven to 350.
Butter a 9×13 baking dish
Blend cream cheese and eggs and season with pepper & garlic powder
Add parmesan cheese and stir until combined
Pour into buttered baking dish



Bake for 17 minutes, until crust is golden brown



LET SIT FOR 10 MINUTES before adding toppings *this is VERY important!
Bump the heat up too 400 degrees

Add toppings, bake another 8-10 minutes


Allow to cool and enjoy!!



You will most likely have to eat this pizza with a fork but when gluten free no carb pizza is your only option eating it with a fork is really no big deal. :)

my memories

Every once and a while I like to update on the "happenings around here"

My blog is not only my way of connecting with the outside world (since I spend my days trapped in this place with two monsters guarding my door) but it is also my journal. I love looking back at old blogs and reading what God has revealed to me at that time in my life, the important dates like Troy's first birthday, Sophia's cute little phrases, fun things we do together as a family... it's all on my blog... my blog is my journal to look back at the good memories and the not so good ones.

So tonight's blog is updating my memories :)

Tony is doing good at work. He is enjoying the new dealership. He likes working with his Dad, they make a good team. Tony is a good man, the kind of man who brings his exhausted wife a Coke Zero at the end of the night and kisses her forehead and tells her to go get a shower :) We have been staying up late every night working on the house, putting in new light fixtures, painting, building walkways outside at midnight (I'm sure our neighbors hate us). Tony's love for the Lord has grown and I'm so proud of him, happy for him and I see the change in his life. I adore him and I am so thankful that we have come this far. Our marriage is a blessing, it was fought for and it feels so good standing in the winner's circle with him. I'm holding out for a weekend getaway with my man soon, hint hint Tony... :)

Sophia is 6 years old, learning to read, loves math and continues to have her Daddy wrapped around her little finger. She never stops talking. She loves being homeschooled, co-op, Awana and most recently a little buckskin pony named, Coco. Most days Sophia is a joy to our home, she does like to provoke her brother as he does her, but most days she is our baby doll toting, makeup sneaking, always into something girly girl. Sophia hasn't had a seizure in a while now, we are seeking some alternative opinions and second opinions, I'm not ready yet but soon I'll give an update about all of that. We have some big appointments coming in the next two months, I'll keep you updated. She had her eye surgery and all went well, other than her new unique ability to breath out of her eyeball... I'm not kidding, I told her she's like a super hero now. I plan on talking to the doctor about it when she goes for her 3 month post op visit.



Troy is 4 years old, sweet little man, who loves his momma. He can't make a decision these days without "eni- meni- myni- mo-" which sounds cute but very well may drive me insane if he doesn't get over this phase soon. Troy eats everything, he is 35lbs now and quite proud of his skinny self. He walks around saying "I'm 35 points!" His favorite thing to eat is tomatoes... he eats them like apples. He waits all day for his Daddy to get home from work to "fight", he likes to wrestle and sword fight and would probably stay up all night "fighting" with his Daddy (his favorite super hero). He loves praying and every prayer starts with "Dear God, I hope we have a great day tomorrow-" Cutest. Thing. Ever.



That's all for now.. my productive day painting, playing outside, reading books and playing "Momma Bears" with the kids has worn me out.

Church bright and early tomorrow so I better get in bed... can't wait to worship our AWESOME God!!

God is stronger

Tucking them in bed...

After I sing, we pray, she looks up at me and says, "Momma, God told me the devil is getting stronger"

Deep breath...

"Yes it does seem that way sometimes"

Deep breath again...

"But God is stronger than the devil so we don't have to be afraid, we need to be aware but not afraid"

I remind myself she is only 6 don't take this over her head.

I kiss her goodnight and walk out of her room.

A silent prayer is lifted up asking God to protect them from Satan's schemes. Keep their eyes on Him throughout their life. Help us grow them strong in faith and mighty in spirit, teaching them the word and living the example for them.

I always pray that God will bless them, that they will continue to grow and lead people to Jesus...
but this prayer was different. This prayer was direct and God told my girl, to tell me, to ask Him for these things.

In Jesus name we pray... amen.

PS: The devil is getting stronger, pray for your children... all children.

school daze...

I really love being my children's teacher.

I was talking to a friend today telling her I can totally see the difference in my children when they are getting 100% of their momma.

When their days are scheduled, when there is purpose and they know what to expect.

It's what they crave and I love being able to give it to them.

Here are some photos I snapped this morning of us in our school daze...

Sophia snacking on some M&Ms doing her math work. We picked Saxon Math 1 (I didn't purchase K because I figured we could get more use out of 1) this year and I am so glad we choose this curriculum. I totally recommend it.



Troy sorting and then eating M&Ms (I love the possibilities in a bag of M&Ms... and the end result is so delicious!)





Sophia hard at work in one of her sensory boxes.
This one is filled with rice. About 7-10 objects are hidden inside and the object is to quietly and carefully so that none of the rice is spilled out, find what is hidden inside. Helps develop fine motor skills as well as assisting in sensory development.



This is Troy's learning poster. He is starting week 1 of 26, Brightly Beaming Steps to Reading. He knows the letters/shapes/number etc. already but I figured this would get him started with a more structured lesson, review what he already knew while adding lots of new material. He LOVED pretending he was a cow today and enjoyed the songs that went along with today's lesson. By the way- this is a free curriculum for anyone with preschool aged children, I did this same curriculum with Sophia and she LOVED it, it was fun reliving those memories today with Troy.

Oh and yes, the N in Martinez is missing, apparently this package of letters had every letter but N... uhm?

OVER AND OUT! :) The monsters are laying down reading/napping quietly and I'm going to enjoy a cup of coffee. Hope everyone is having a good Monday!